New things, new things.

Long time no see, eh? Been back (from my travels) for a while now, and my -please excuse me the straight translation from finnish in lack of the correct word- poem vein has been lost. It correlates to other things being lost first, but that's another story.

Anyway, thanks to my alltime fave Miss Inspiration, who just recently became Mrs. inspiration, I have something to say. I'm planning to launch a new blog. But first, I got this award, my first one ever, from dear Nella. Thank you, did not expect anything like this :)

I'm supposed to let the good rotate, and name blogs that I want to give this award. I will, but first I want to get back into the blogger world.

Being beautiful blogger award winner :), I'm supposed to tell seven things about myself. Here's the list:

1. My new blog will be in Finnish. Little Capriole still exists, but I'm not sure if I'm gonna update it from now on.
2. I had a name for my blog, pieni kulkija, but unfortunately it was not available in that form. I'll fix something. The blog, however, will have the tittle "Maailmassa monta on ihmeellistä asiaa". The words come from a children's song.
3. I love to learn. Sometimes learning is painful. :)
4. Early fall is the best time of the year, with cool breeze of wind and clear sunny skies.
5. I find peace in big cities' coffee shops, with a good book in hand or in the countryside on a horseback or at my parents farm.
6. I have big dreams that I sometimes loose sight to. But I never stop believing that I can find them again.
7. I'm moving towards less is more, I hope.

The Way of Thinking

When someone I love has, in my opinion, mistreated me I;

1. Start thinking of all the great qualities of this person
2. Think of some memory when we laughed together or had great time in some other way
3. Get to this third point, and let's say 10 seconds has passed, all the negative thoughts and "oh (s)he did me soooo wrong"s are gone and I remember again that every person has a right to make their own decisions and I have a right to not give in to bad feelings that would otherwise poison my day.

Destination Vancouver, B.C, Ca

Next fall, I'm going to Vancouver. I got the idea a couple of months ago, and just applied for a working-holiday visa -and happened to get one! I want to experience the Winter Olympics, meet people and just have a great time facing new challenges.

I visited Vancouver in the summer of 2007, and loved the city very much. When I realised that my job contract is ending next September, and that the Games are in a country that I like very much and is somewhat familiar, it just felt like I have no choice but to go.

As you might guess, I'm excited and frightened at the same time. I'm going to stay over the winter, leaving in October and coming back to Finland propably in April.

I cannot wait, but at the same time I enjoy this moment, right now. After all, I have all summer long to enjoy good weather and friends and dancing and my pony and all the things I love so very much.

I am happy :)

Edit: I think this means I'm going to Tofino and Back Again

Pursuit

Improvement, growing up, happiness, eagerness for challenges. Challenge? Risk? Dreams vs. threads? Where I might end up by always taking the safe bet. How far can I go by giving up the fear, giving up the "wise" options? Pursuing my limits, continuously pushing them further. This is not my combat anymore, I'm not afraid of following my dreams.

I'm moving to Vancouver for some time next fall. That's all I know so far. Well, that and the fact that I posses a work permit. There's a proverb that says something about bewaring what one dreams of, because that is exactly what one might get. I remember few years ago thinking to myself that if I only had taken a break, a year off, after senior high before going to college. Well, the break is about to come. And I'm excited.

Traveling is scary, starting over in a new place, is even more so. It is also a huge opportunity, a new chance to explore who I am, and how far I can go. Who knows what adventures i'm about to face. But I'm pursuing my dremas. And I'm excited.

Promise.

No matter how many times I might fall, I will never stop believing in love. Because if I did that, I would lose me and end up being nothing but an empty shell. I'd be cynical and never seeing nothing but the dark sides.

Yes. I will feel the life running thru my vains, I will feel love, till my heart stops beating and then, at that moment, I know that I have lived.

Review

Love of books, articles, essays. Love of words and images, dreams they paint. Eyes wander gently thru phrases, cherishing every word, dot, emphasis. Like lover's hands on the soft skin and curve of hip, waist. Lips on collarbone. Or rushing thru phrases, violently jumping on words, skipping rudely few of them. And needing more, more, more... out of pure pleasure.

So many different kinds of texts, so many different ways to read them. Reading like someone's hunting you. Reading like making love. Writing like making love.

I found a text that is written with so much emotion in it that it is easy to feel the wind, the fresh air of the Pacific. With so much pain, that it takes the breath away, even as a complete outsider.

http://blog.isaac.shabtay.com/2009/04/low-tide.html

Sometimes words are like photographs, as they draw a detailed picture in front of eyes. Sometimes words are even more than that, and there's no way of escaping the word they create. Nor there is any will to escape.

I am eager to hear if any of my readers have a text to recommend. I love words.

Playing the Notes

Lately I've started all kinds of things and been many times in situations that I haven't faced before. New situations always cause a tension of somekind, because it requires crossing the lines of your comfort zone. Comfort zone is the behavioral patterns, hobbies, places etc. where you've been a lot and they are familiar and you know how to act. It is easy to feel like a prey in a place that's not familiar as everybody else has an agenda they fullfil-or so it seems.

New thing always means challenge, escspecially when it includes getting in to a group that has been formed before you came across. People tend to keep walls up high towards new comers, some higher, some lower but they always excist as there's a need to evaluate the person. Girls do this very "openly" and they usually put their attitude on show. I think this is because of fear, as a new girl in a group can always mean competition. What I have found to be very usefull is just not competing with them. No one can play games with you if you don't play the game. Dropping all attitudes when getting into a new social network takes you far! And whoa what realizing this has brought to me!

People make judgements by cover, and this, I think, is because of the fear of unknown. It is rather funny to hear girls (and guys too!!) making comments like "what is she trying to do etc." After I started trying to eliminate all these kinds of acts out of my own social behaviour, wearing an open attitude and simply smiling more it's been great to notice that more and more great people have started marching into my life. And it is so simple! I'm not saying that I take a new person under my skin, that's just stupid. But I try to see other people's point of view and not being judgemental. Still keeping my own values- but I realize it is not taken away from me if somebody else is not exactly like me.